When people ask me what I do, I say ‘Death and Sex’. They look at me inquisitively and I explain.
For part of the week I am raising awareness of death, dying and grief and the other part of the week I am working with young people supporting them around relationships and sexual health. But isn’t that a strange combination? Not at all.
Many people feel uncomfortable talking openly about both death and sex. However, the skills we need to have these conversations, and the way we approach these discussions, are the same.
I originally trained as a Nurse but quickly realised that my passion and interest lay in Public Health. After completing a Msc in Health Promotion and Health Education I spent the next 10 years working in the NHS and Civil Service in a range of strategic and management positions mainly focusing on teenage pregnancy and young people’s sexual health.
In 2004, I left the public sector to set up my own business. The initial focus of my business was on sexual & reproductive health. However, in 2011, my work began to include end of life care and end of life care planning and so my passion for talking openly about death, dying and grief began.
For the last 15 years I have worked on a range of innovative projects that promote open conversations about death, dying, end of life care planning and grief. I also design and deliver training and workshops for both practitioners and the public.
I have worked in the public and charity sectors for over twenty years with roles in communication, training and volunteer and service management. Like many people, my paid work combined with unpaid work – caring for children and for an older family member.
Through my own experience and those of colleagues and friends, I became increasingly aware of the stress of juggling these competing priorities and how undervalued care is. This growing awareness intersected with an innovative project that promoted opportunities to talk about planning for end of life and challenged the taboo of talking about death, dying and grief.
This led me to train as a Funeral Celebrant which further enhanced my awareness of how much need there is for safe spaces to talk openly and safely about our experience and feelings around death, dying and grief.
I combine my role as Director of Creating Conversations CIC with a role as Head of Services for a local charity that works with and for older people. I also provide funeral and memorial celebrancy and celebration life writing.
I have been attending Creating Conversations’ Death Cafes for a couple of years and find them to be wonderfully positive spaces for honest and open conversation with strangers. Death Cafes create a deep sense of human connection and I feel grateful to be a part of holding space for this.
I am an artist, metal patination technician, life coach and End of Life Companion and believe strongly that in regular contemplation of our deaths we grasp how precious our life is and what matters most to us.
Hi, I'm Ash! I'm a filmmaker, potter, and aspiring death doula new to London via Chicago. I'm so happy to have found Creating Conversations and love being a part of the table host team. Holding space for others to engage and reflect on these challenging but fruitful topics is incredibly valuable to my journey as a grieving person. I believe it's imperative to talk about death and grief and will ultimately help us live fuller, brighter lives. I hope attendees walk away feeling uplifted and seen, I know I often do.
Hi, my name’s Jon and I have been a table host for Creating Conversations since it began in-person Death Cafes in early 2021.
I started attending various Death Cafes in early 2020 as I had a need to gain a deeper understanding and acceptance of death.
As a table host, it’s a privilege to speak and listen to a wide range of people with differing experiences, feelings and approaches towards death.
Every meeting throws up new and invigorating conversations along with keen insight and, perhaps surprisingly, great humour.
I hope everyone will gain as much benefit as I have done from attending Creating Conversations events!
I started coming to the Creating Conversations Death Cafe a little over a year ago, initially out of simple interest. As time progressed, I have come to see how important these opportunities are. They enable people in grief, fear, wonder or any combination of emotions, to express their feelings, ask their questions, listen to others - all in a trusting and caring environment.
I was a college lecturer for many years, teaching a range of students, from sixteen to adult, so apart from my own personal experience, I saw how life events affected a great many people around me, and observed how difficult it was sometimes for them to express themselves adequately without attracting judgement or sentimentality from others. I have seen how Creating Conversations provides that safe space, to allow people to let their guard down without threat, and talk openly about death, dying, their grief, or similar subjects; and how refreshing it can be to have those conversations.
I find volunteering at Death and Grief Cafe events to be a great privilege, and am always touched by the insight, honesty and care that participants bring to the events.
Being aware of death as a fact of life, and sharing how our experiences of death shape us, feel like important things to do. I always leave our events profoundly aware of how lucky we are to be here, and how meaningful it can be to help one another through the hard times we encounter together.
Being a table host has been so eye opening as every cafe is so different and the conversations so varied. It’s a great way to hear different experiences and gain perspective.
I have worked and volunteered with vulnerable adults at the later/end stages of life and have found Death Cafes a wonderful space to discuss those questions, joys and fears about life and what comes next.
I was drawn to The Creating Conversations Grief & Death Cafes following my own personal bereavement. After a year into my grief journey I found it to be comforting and helpful being around other bereaved people, sharing different experiences & insights in a safe space.
Death as a subject also became a curious subject for me and one I wanted to explore further as I recognise that as a society we are mostly rubbish at having these open conversations about death.
After attending various sessions as a participant I have recently embarked on the role as table host. I feel like I learn something new every time I attend. I expand my horizons & meet a lot of interesting people so overall a very valuable experience and I feel privileged to be a part of it.
Hi, my name is Sophie and I feel privileged to be a table host for Creating Conversations around death and grief.
The topic of death is such a taboo, and sadly many of us decide to ignore it – often because we are unsure how to address it, hold the space for ourselves and for others.
My aim is to contribute to foster understanding and compassion, feel gratitude for what today has to offer, build resilience, empathy and open a judgment-free conversation for those navigating the complexities of loss and bereavement in order to live happier lives together.
I have been attending the Creating Conversations Death and Grief Cafes over the past two years and enjoy being in a supportive space where one can openly and honestly talk about death, dying and grief. There is never any expectation or judgement, and I always leave feeling calm and grounded afterwards. Every meeting is so different, and the varied range of experiences, perspectives and approaches to contemplating life and death are insightful, inspiring and sometimes surprisingly funny too.
Working on education interventions for vulnerable young people and adults, I see the importance of having such death-positive spaces that enable people to process very complex thoughts and feelings.
It is a privilege to support Creating Conversations in this work.
I greatly enjoy my work with Creating Conversations, helping to host the Death and Grief Cafes. It’s a genuine privilege to hear the stories of people who attend our events, and a humbling and educational experience to exchange views with such a diverse range of people. I’m very proud of the welcoming, inclusive and non-judgemental space we provide.
I would describe myself as ‘death-positive’ and someone who actively seeks out conversations about these topics, rather than shying away from them as so many do. People often seem uncomfortable when I tell them about the Death Café, and assume it must be very heavy and intense. Sometimes it can be, but more often than not, I find that in talking about death, what we are really talking about is life. In this way, I always feel invigorated and inspired after attending one of the Death Cafes!
I am currently training to be a psychotherapist and hope to specialise in grief counselling once qualified. I have also previously worked as a Bereavement Volunteer with Cruse, the bereavement support charity.
